Jan 6th Commission Canceled After Everyone Agrees Trump Won Election Fair And Square WASHINGTON, D.C.—Congress has voted down a proposed commission to look into the events of January 6th after everyone realized that Trump actually won the election fair and square in 2020. The post Jan 6th Commission Canceled After […]
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‘At Least Our Military Was Inclusive,’ Says Conquered American Working In Chinese Prison Camp In Year 2025 SAN DIEGO, CHINA—Conquered Americans laboring away among other undesirables in a Chinese prison camp remember fondly how the American military, when it was still around, was a fully inclusive institution. The post ‘At Least […]
McDonald’s Drive Thru Backs Up For Miles As Dr. Fauci Keeps Changing His Mind WASHINGTON, D.C.—A beltway McDonald’s caused a major traffic jam yesterday, as the drive-thru backed up for miles while Dr. Fauci spent several hours trying to decide the right order. The post McDonald’s Drive Thru Backs Up […]
Shohei Ohtani Plows Through Catcher After Forgetting To Let Go Of 100 MPH Fastball Read more… Published at Fri, 28 May 2021 21:13:59 +0000
The Most Jaw-Dropping Quotes From The ‘Friends’ Reunion “I’m not saying another fucking word until I see that $5 million check.” Read more… Published at Fri, 28 May 2021 21:13:58 +0000
Liberals hold emergency session to teach MPs what cameras do OTTAWA- After MP William Amos was caught with his pants down again in a public Zoom session, The Liberal Party has called an emergency session to show their caucus how cameras actually work as they clearly do not understand that […]
Millennial woman horrified to learn she just wakes up early now Dartmouth, NS – A millennial woman has been horrified to discover that she just wakes up early now, all on her own. Brittany Austin, 31, made the frightening discovery last weekend, when she attempted to sleep off her sixty-hour […]
Reporters Cheer As Biden Takes Huge Bite Out Of Microphone Mistaking It For Ice Cream CLEVELAND, OH—President Joe Biden wowed reporters again with his love for ice cream. Biden had gone to Honey Hut Ice Cream, and while he waited for his order, a FOX News reporter approached Biden to […]
CDC Warns Against Kissing, Snuggling Backyard Poultry The CDC recently issued an advisory after an increase in reported salmonella cases across the country, warning backyard farmers against getting too close to poultry in ways that could easily spread germs, like kissing or snuggling. What do you think? Read more… Published […]
Biden Creates OnlyFans Account To Share Exclusive Ice Cream Eating Pics With Journalists WASHINGTON, D.C.—White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki announced today that President Biden has created an account on OnlyFans* to share sensual photos and videos of himself eating ice cream with his admirers in the mainstream media. The post […]